The Losers (2010)

In 2010, a crack military special-forces unit was framed for a crime they didn’t commit. No, not that crack military special-forces unit. This time around it’s The Losers, the equally lethal and quirky bunch torn from the pages of the DC/Vertigo comic of the same name.

As previously suggested, the story is a familiar one. A unit of five highly trained soldiers, led by Clay and his two-day-old facial scruff (Jeffrey Dean Morgan), is sent on a super-secret CIA mission into the jungles of Bolivia. Each man is uniquely equipped and colorfully named for the job. There’s Roque (Idris Elba), Clay’s second-in-command who always seems on the verge of mutiny; Pooch (Columbus Short), the transportation and heavy artillery expert, who’s also got a pregnant wife at home; Cougar (Oscar Jaenada), the silent but deadly long-range marksman; and Jensen (Chris Evans), whose goatee and specs let you know he’s the nerdy tech and communications man, despite what his bulging biceps have to say.

The guys believe they’re on a routine mission to scout out and “paint” a terrorist target for a tactical air strike. But things go wrong, base command refuses to call off the mission, and a mysterious voice on the walkie-talkie, known only as Max (Jason Patric), orders their extraction helicopter blown to smithereens. Presumed dead, they are publicly pegged as rogues, blamed for what becomes a political blemish on America’s record, and stranded in South America. But a gorgeous woman with dubious intentions named Aisha (Zoe Saldana) volunteers to help them get home and gain revenge against Max.

In the opening scene of The Losers, the 1970′s classic “Black Betty” plays in the background as the boys bide their time in the jungle playing cards. It feels like an oblique nod to the buddy war films of that decade, like Kelly’s Heroes, from which this one will ultimately borrow liberally. But it’s also clear from watching these macho men wager ever-bigger phalluses–I mean weapons–that director Sylvain White intends to do something different with this well-trodden portion of the action genre. Which is, to give it a much-needed sense of humor. Tropic Thunder invited you to laugh at these canon-toting cartoon characters. This film invites you to laugh with them.

Don’t get me wrong. Stuff still blows up. There are at least three very big, very satisfying explosions strategically placed throughout the film. Even when things aren’t on fire, White pays close attention to the visuals–with elaborate set pieces that take us all over the globe, effective use of slow motion, and judicious use of the increasingly popular handheld camera–that are the hallmarks of both action and comic book films.

In its onscreen incarnation, The Losers is thankfully less dark, gritty, and angular than Andy Diggle and Jock’s pulp source material. But White acknowledges the comic’s contribution with the occasional freeze-frame tableau. Kudos, too, to scribes Peter Berg and James Vanderbilt for their contribution to the balanced wise-crack-to-explosion ratio. I read the first issue of the comic (available for free download on the DC Comics website) and the dialogue is nowhere near as clever.

The most exhilarating action, though, doesn’t involve hand grenades or snukes (the futuristic weapon of mass destruction that Max tries to get his hands on) but rather hand-to-hand combat. A “getting to know you” hotel fight between Aisha and Clay flies in the face of current popular filmmaking by refusing to substitute an abundance of shaky camerawork and quick cuts for actual fight choreography. The payoff is a scene that is by far sexier than the film’s actual love scenes. A later mano-a-mano confrontation is less steamy but equally gratifying.

Of course, it doesn’t hurt that Morgan and Saldana are hotter than a firecracker lit at both ends. With his rugged lackadaisical charisma, square jaw, and deeply dimpled smile, Morgan is half Robert Downey, Jr., half Javier Bardem, and altogether perfect for this role. And even though Saldana could stand to eat a chicken nugget or two, fellows will no doubt be lining up to ask her to shoulder their missile launchers.

On the other hand, the film’s comic standard-bearers are Evans, a brilliant casting choice, and Patric. Evans manages not to become annoying in spite of his incessant joking and wears a parade of phallic t-shirts (I saw guns, pop-art hot dogs, and mushrooms) with a wink and a nod. Meanwhile, Patric is a sarcastic, evil genius, who is unafraid to play to both the pit and the rafters. Who says camp is always a bad thing?

Best of all, it seems I don’t have to follow through on last week’s threat to call Short’s agent, after all. Both Short and Jaenada deliver solidly. Elba, though, seems content to give a vaguely volatile performance and serve primarily as additional eye candy.

All in all, The Losers is a winner. It’s got humor, sex appeal, and just the right amount of fireworks. Those other soldiers of fortune better watch their backs.

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